The Alphabet Game from Whose Line Is It Anyway? II

I was telling you about the Alphabet game from the popular Whose Line Is It Anyway? . The game called for quick reflexes and thought – though mistakes were often made – and it was a treat to watch. I gave a couple of examples and here are some more.

Paul Merton stuck in quicksand, requests Jim Meskimen for help to get out. They start from P.

Paul: Please help me!
Jim: Quicksand is it?
Paul: R… (errr…) yes.
Jim: Say nothing, say nothing, I’ll pull you out.
Paul: Today if you could!
Jim: Undoubtedly. Grab my hand then.
Paul: Verily I will.
Jim: Well here we go, well, pull… (Jim tries to pull Paul out)
Paul: (a small pause)…X-rays, I need x-rays! My arm’s broken!
Jim: Yes, it feels like it is!
Paul: Zor, Zorro was my favourite children’s doh… I think the quicksand is seeping into my brain!
Jim: Are you a sad little man? You are aren’t you?
Paul: Basically, yes!
Jim: Come on, I’ll get you back out here on dry land. (Jim pulls Paul out)
Paul: Damn! I nearly died in that quicksand.
Jim: Everybody does, you know.
Paul: Finally yes, they do.
Jim: Goodbye to the quicksand then.
Paul: Hello to a new life.
Jim: I love you!
Paul: Just saying that!
Jim: Kinky little devil!
Paul: Love me?
Jim: Much, much, much, much, much.
Paul: …Noooo!
Jim: Oh yes!

Josie Lawrence and Sandi Toksvig on a parachute jump. They have to start with A, but Josie makes a blooper. See for yourself.

Clive: (to audience) Which letter of the alphabet would you like to start off with?  (Gets shouts of “Q”)
Josie: (mouths) Oh no
Clive: Q? A real cruel one to start with. So you start with Q. You’ve got to get all the way round to P… and the situation you’ve got to improvise is – one is talking the other one into taking a parachute jump
Josie: Do we start with Q?
Clive: Start with Q and end with P at the end
Sandi: She’s been practising from A, though
Josie: I have, I didn’t realise you were…
Clive: Yes, well, it give some sort of innovation
Josie: …sorry, I forgot…
Sandi: Parachute. (starts) Queen’s Regiment, their going to take us up in their plane
Josie: (laughs) I’m sorry… can we start again?
Clive: In your own time, Josie
Sandi: It’s only one letter

Sandi: Alright are you ready?
Josie: But there’s one thing I haven’t told you…
Sandi: Cor, what?
Josie: Don’t want to do it!
Sandi: (angrily) Every time we go anywhere you always say you don’t want to do it!
Josie: (upset) Flippin’ heck, don’t shout at me!
Sandi: Good grief, we never do anything interesting!
Josie: …(crying) Huh-huh-huh…
Sandi: I wish I’d thought of that!
Josie: Joking apart, I’m ready!
Sandi: Know what?
Josie: Let me know, what?
Sandi: My parachute’s bigger than your parachute.
Josie: Nooo!
Sandi: Oh yes!
Josie: Perhaps that’s ‘cos you’ve got a big bum!
Sandi: Queen’s Regiment are taking us up!
Josie: Ripping fellows, those soldiers!
Sandi: So are you not nervous or anything?
Josie: Touchy, touchy, but not nervous. Just touchy.
Sandi: Under the wing is a very bad place to land.
Josie: Very, very bad, so I’ve heard!
Sandi: Well you could end up in hospital. (Josie can’t think what letter comes next and Sandi makes an X with her hands)
Josie: X-rays! X-rays! I’m scared of X-rays!
Sandi: Yes it could be very serious. (draws a Z in the air with her finger)
Josie: Zoo! Zoo! Look – zoo! I hope we don’t land in the zoo!

To be continued…..


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