The “Courtroom Scene” from Whose Line Is It Anyway? II

I had told you about the extremely farcial but extremely funny “Courtroom Scene” game from Whose Line Is It Anyway? and provided examples.

Here is The Case of the Stolen Chicken, with Colin Mochrie as the judge, Steve Frost as the prosecutor, and Ryan Stiles and Tony Slattery as the witnesses

Colin: (bangs gavel on Stephen’s hand) Sorry. Order in the court! Order in the court!

Stephen: Objection. That bleedin’ hurt.

Colin: Overruled. Call your first witness please.

Stephen: Certainly your honour. I’m about to tie up the loose ends of this ridiculous chicken stealing case. (Tony enters in furry hat, covering his eyes)

Stephen: Will you please raise your right hand. (Tony raises his left hand) Put it down, that stinks. Now, give me your name please.

Tony: I am the dowager Duchess of Verona.

Stephen: Ha HA!…

Colin: (bangs gavel) Sustained!

Stephen: And where were you on the 29th of the 5th of the 7th of the 4th of the … I can’t remember the date but it all ends in 72.

Tony: I was inserting myself in this badger. I’m afraid I won’t be a terribly useful witness as I saw nothing.

Colin: I’m sorry, this witness is immaterial. Please call your second witness, and then call your mother, she worries. (Ryan enters in army officer’s cap)

Stephen: Now, your full name and rank please Lieutenant. Whoops, gave it away. Never mind.

Ryan: Lieutenant Jack, the frozen chicken king. I raise chickens, I kill ’em, I freeze ’em and eat ’em.

Stephen: So this man would have every motivation to steal the chicken!

Ryan: Not really. I own the farm.

Stephen: No further questions your honour. I made a complete prat of meself with that one.

Colin: You better come up with something more sustaining… I’m tired, go ahead.

Stephen: Will you please state your full name.

Tony: (enters in brown hat) ‘Ello. ‘Arry the ‘at, ‘Arry the ‘at, end of the pier comedian, joke for every occasion. ‘Ere we go, why did the chicken die? Who knows?

Stephen: That is what we are here to find out.

Tony: Look over there! (kicks Stephen as he looks away)

Stephen: Molesting the prosecutor, your honour.

Colin: Objection!… Sustained!… This Courtroom is a Mochrie! (constantly bangs gavel) I want my next witness!!! (end of gavel breaks off)

Stephen: I’m sorry your honour…. Where’s the end of your gavel?

Colin: It’s immaterial.

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